There’s a lot of misunderstanding when it comes to the idea of self-care. When I ask people what they think it means, the answers range anywhere from clueless looks, to risqué comments, to things like “well it means getting pampered, right?”

No.

Self-care doesn’t mean going to the salon and the masseuse on the weekly. It doesn’t mean constantly splurging on new clothes, accessories, or shoes. And it certainly doesn’t mean using your need for “care” as an excuse to justify bad habits.

Self-care means taking care of yourself so that you can be the best, healthiest, most successful you. It means not letting your own needs fall by the wayside while you focus on “all the things.” I’ll admit, wrapping my head around the idea of this took me a while.

Caregivers are naturally inclined to “sacrifice” for the people they’re caring for.

You work the overtime, your stay up late trying to get stuff done, you just keep going when you feel like crap. Moms especially are constantly foregoing things for themselves in favor of things for their family. I can’t even tell you the number of times I went without in the last five years for “the good of the family.” Skipped meals. Lost sleep. Walked around for days in ridiculous amounts of pain. We take it, push through, and keep going, because we’re the backbones and the foundations of the family.

That’s admirable. But eventually we’re going to run ourselves into the ground.

As a single mama, there is no one to pick up the slack if something happens to me. Taking care of myself is vital for my family. I have to eat, sleep, exercise, and be able to relax. No one wants an overtired, grumpy mama bear running the show. I don’t want to be an overtired, grumpy mama bear who’s growling at her kids because she’s got a migraine. And, most importantly, I have to stay well enough to keep them well.

That’s why self-care is so important for overall health.

And it can be easy!

There are about a dozen things I do on a daily basis that don’t even take up an hour total. Spread throughout my day, they’re the little pick-me-ups I need to stay productive, and they keep me focused and charged. Here’s a short breakdown of some of my favorites:

Bath Time

This is sooooo important to me. I know there are plenty of people who push the idea of days without showers, but I’m not one of them. For me, there’s nothing I love more than to “wash the day off” and physically prepare my body for the next day. Even a five minute shower at midnight gives me that “ahh” feeling and the chance to reset. (Of course, my phenomenal bodycare products help with relaxation.)

Guided Meditation

Meditation is one of my favorite ways to relax. I love guided meditation, because it helps me focus and ground myself in the moment. For a constant multitasker, it can be difficult to focus on one thing. Practicing meditation daily has helped me compartmentalize, which cuts down on the stress of my constant to-do list.

I usually mediate in the morning during my commute and again at night before bed. My commute is usually the only point of the morning I have to myself, so I use it to set my day. At night my focus is relaxation and noting. I highly recommend both the Stop. Breathe. Think. app and the Headspace app for guided meditations that can be accessed anywhere.

Time to Play

It’s easy to lose sight of the most important things when you’re busy. But if you’re not having fun, chances are your life is going to be shorter.

I make sure I take time to play, both with my kids but also by myself. I take time for my own hobbies, which is another great outlet for stress relief. It’s also a great way for mamas to remember that they’re a person beyond just “Mama.” And it doesn’t have to be a solo kayaking trip. Even if I play the piano for my girls or paint something to decorate our home with, it’s still some “me” time.

Diffuser User

I love my diffusers and the boost my essential oils give me. I keep them going almost around the clock and the background scents enhance my day. Even if I’m too busy to stop going, oils that help promote calm let me keep checking things off my list without getting stressed. Orange, peppermint, and grapefruit are staples that promote happiness, calm, and focus. I love them!

Homey Home

Our favorite place is home. No matter where we go, how far apart we might be, or how long we’re away, at the end of the day we all come home. One of the best self-care things I’ve found for me and my girls is for us to know that there’s a cozy, safe, relaxing place called “home.” It is are place to be, to chill, to enjoy, and to let “us do us.” Whether we’re making forts in the living room or all piled into my bed reading, we love being together and having our little refuge from the rest of the world. And those moments together are really better than anything else I do.

What are your favorite self-care techniques?